Wanted
by Meggin Lane
Summary: Just because it looks like you are about to be smote by a power drunk angel, doesn't mean you won't be snagged by a vengeful Leprechaun.
1. Chapter 1

"Wanted"

Just because it looks like you are about to be smote by a power drunk angel, doesn't mean you won't be snagged by a vengeful Leprechaun.

Don't own 'em, just Love em' wished ta hell I worked for Kripke

wWw

Dean, Sam and Bobby were in a face off against Castiel; their one time friend and heavenly ally. The angel in the familiar rumpled trench coat had just absorbed all the souls from the denizens of purgatory and had gone mad with the energy surge that that had given him and now he thought himself to be the new "true" god.

"BOW BEFORE ME AND PROFESS YOUR LOVE TO ME AS YOUR NEW LORD OR I SHALL DESTROY YOU!" the angel bellowed at the three men in front of him.

Dean had tried to talk some some sense into his old friend, tried to remind him that he had been as close as family to him, but the angel only sneered back and declared once more that they would all be punished if they did not comply and then told them the punishment would not stop here for he planned to go back to heaven and punish all of Raphael's followers too!

He was high on wrath and low on reason, "FALL DOWN AND DECLARE ME TO BE YOUR TRUE GOD!" shouted the angel and he raised his arm to prepare the strike.

Dean stepped back and grabbed Bobby's shirt with one hand and Sam's shirt with his other. Suddenly the room was flooded with bright light and all three men crouched in a huddle holding their eyes tightly closed against it's brilliance.

Even the angel winced and put his outstretched arm across his eyes to block the light. And just as suddenly the light was gone. When Castiel opened his eyes he blinked once, then twice because all three men had gone with the light too. And it was then that the empty room was filled with the glass shattering sound of the new gods frustrated rage, his first attempt at smiting had been taken away right out from under him.

wWw

After the bright light disappeared the first thing that Dean noticed was that he was still breathing. Then with his eyes still closed he squeezed the shoulders of the men he was still holding on to. They all seemed to be breathing too and slowly they stood up from the huddle and each began to open their eyes and look around at where they were.

Sam said, "Dean?" in a soft puzzled voice.

Bobby said, "What the hell?" in a gruff puzzled voice.

Dean looked down at the blue grass he was standing on, then over to the thick trunks of the tall blue trees trees surrounding them. The bark had a texture like skin and the heavy branches sported translucent glinting leaves. Even the air smelled different, fragrant, heady with oxygen, it made him almost dizzy.

Just then all three men ducked as the breeze from a giant butterfly with kaleidoscopic colored wings fluttered overhead.

And Dean turned to the two people he considered family and said in a shaky voice, "I don't think we're in Kansas anymore."

wWw

There was a sound of slow clapping behind them and all three spun around to face the source. "Very observant _for a human _the man saidnodding at Dean.

Sam recognized the man immediately. "You!" he hissed and stepped forward to put himself between the man and his brother.

Dean glanced warily at Sam and said, "You know this mook?"

Sam huffed and answered, "He's the Leprechaun."

Bobby had heard the story and asked, "THE Leprechaun, the one that broke into our world and started snatching people?"

The Leprechaun spoke, "Not just any people, first born sons." And he walked closer to Bobby and looked him over saying derisively, "Little older than we usually take but that fishing net I dropped on you just now brought in a bumper crop of first borns so I can't complain."

"But," Sam stammered "I'm not..."

"First born to your human parents, no." the Leprechaun clarified sounding sad, "But after all the demon blood you drank, it transformed you, you fulfilled a prophesy and became the first born son of Satan just as Lilith had become his first born daughter. And we honor the traditions of every race, culture and religion so youbetcha you qualify!"

All three men stood stunned at this new information so they didn't even have time to shield their eyes when the next flash of bright light surrounded them and deposited them in a dim, dank place that smelled of fear and death.

Dean squinted as his eyes got used to the dark and then he walked over to one of the walls and pulled a rusted shackle away from it and let it fall back against the rock with a dull "clank". "A dungeon? Really? Isn't this a bit cliche?" he remarked aloud.

A voice out of the shadows answered, " You'll find that we Fae are big fans of tradition," said the Leprechaun as he seemed to ooze from the darkness and into the the dim light. Then with a flick of his wrist the shackles came alive, the manacles snapping like teeth and suddenly each mans wrists were encircled and they were strung up tight against the cold wall.

"Now I have leave momentarily so make yourselves comfortable while we decide your fate." And stepping up close to Sam he sneered and nodded toward Dean, "Did you really think a mere angel could stop us from claiming what was ours? I told you we have ways to get in back doors and real magic out trumps anything those feathered clones could dish out even on their best day."

And then he turned and left. There was no sound of a door opening and closing, no footsteps growing fainter, just the faint 'plip, plip, plip' of water dripping in the distance beyond the dim light.

Dean sighed deeply and said, "Crap! Damn dripping water, now I feel like I gotta pee."

To Be Continued

Reviews are what keeps the plot bunnies hop 'in


	2. Chapter 2

Wanted - Chapter 2

I've never tried introducing a song to set the mood for what I've written before but I ran across this one and it's perfect for the major theme of this chapter: feeling disoriented and like a stranger in a strange land, so I want each reader to take a moment before delving into chapter-2 and go on to YouTube and listen to this rendition of "Welcome To The Jungle" by 2Cellos-Sulic & Hauser. I know posting addresses can be tricky on this site but try this:

www dot youtube dot com backslash watch?v equalmark mSBjEMGtaU&ob equalmark av3e

Remember to take out the spaces and then remember to come back and read this-hehe.

Don't own 'em, just Love 'em. Wished ta hell I worked for Kripke

wWw

It hadn't taken the leprechaun long to return and when he did he made an announcement. "Ok, listen up!" he said in a clipped tone. Clasping his hands behind his back he paced back and forth in front of the men like a drill sergeant. "You've been requisitioned to serve at the feast tonight."

All three men shot each other nervous glances.

A distant sound from the dim recesses of the dungeon captured their attention. As it got closer the hunters realized that it was the metered steps of small booted feet. And three female elves marched in bearing clothing. Each elf stationed herself in front of a manacled prisoner and the next thing the men knew they were unchained from the wall.

But instead of being free Sam, Dean and Bobby found themselves standing inside separate dressing booths. The leprechaun snapped his fingers and the men suddenly found themselves naked.

"Whoa!"

"Hey, what the...?"

"Balls!" Expressed the prisoners.

Shocked and suddenly chilly each man rushed to the half door of his dressing booth, and looked to each side to see the same look of helpless fear reflected in the other mens' eyes.

A small uttered "Ahem" made them look down to see the three elves in front of their doors. Each elf was holding the clothes that had formerly been on their backs a moment ago under one arm, and a bundle of new clothes under the other.

Then the leprechaun intoned in a bored fashion, "All of your classless attire is unsuitable for this affair so re-suit in the uniforms provided for you as proper servers of the banquet." And the elves reached over the doors to pass a garment and sandals to each man.

Dean saw what he was handed to wear and made a disgusted face, "You're kidding right?" He said as he shook the dark suede cloth at the female attendant and scoffed, "Bobby's got more material in his hat that this..."

The leprechaun walked over to the door and told him, "That is the finest leather of the rarest animal in all of the Everafter, it will not wrinkle or stain and self adjusts to fit the wearer in the most flattering way possible. It is quite an honor to be allowed to wear so formal attire on your first day of servitude."

"It's nothing but a loin cloth!" Dean protested. He turned the material over in his hands to figure out how to wear it adding "and not a very big one at that."

The Fae man then stepped up nearly face to face with Dean and said, "Never the less... you will wear it or you and the other two humans will be put to death."

Bobby reached over his dressing room door to "his Elf" and quickly grabbed his hat from the pile that had been his clothes; then he gave her a glare that said it wouldn't be good for her health to try and take it back. She just gave him a bored shrug, handed him his serving uniform and suddenly the elves holding all their former clothing were gone.

The men in the booths looked once at each other then with significant grumbling began to don their attire. Dean said, " Come on! I don't know if I'm puttin' this thing on frontwards or backwards."

Sam replied, "Uh, I don't think it matters" as he tried to 'adjust himself' to be as comfortable as possible.

Bobby growled back at both of them, "Ah, quitcher bitchin'!" Then the could hear him utter, "Umph" and "Damn" and "If I had a dime for the dang fool situations you two find...and drag me into!" "Humph!"

The leprechaun rolled his eyes and coughed. "Gentlemen, and I use that term loosely, don't be shy..." and 'poof' the dressing booths were gone and the three men stood blinking against bright light and casting awkward glances at each other.

"Well," the Fae man sighed, "I suppose this will have to do until you have better training. In a moment you will be sent for. Until then try to practice being 'poised'." And he disappeared.

Bobby's loin cloth rode a little higher than the boys and he made sure he had put his hat firmly on his head. But as soon as the leprechaun was gone he immediately moved over to the wall where the Fae kept appearing and disappearing to check for any crack to indicate an opening. Sam and Dean did their best to avert their eyes from their friend... and each other... having already seen way more than they'd ever wanted to because good fit or not, loin cloths just don't have a lot of 'coverage'.

Sam gestured at his attire and said, "I guess these are so we don't try to smuggle in any weapons."

To which Dean smirked saying, "It doesn't mean I'm still not packin' " and he waggled his brows.

Sam rolled his eyes and was about to rebut when Bobby stepped up and growled, "You two just shut it! And make like the good cabana boys you're supposed to be, while we all keep our eyes and ears open." He tugged up his waist ban even higher and tugged his hat down even lower for emphasis then said, "at least these sandals they give us are comfortable... arch supports...pretty good fit too."

As if on cue one of the elves that had taken their clothes appeared and said, "Follow me to your stations. You will be serving the libations for the evening. Do not attempt to make conversation, most of the Fae do not speak any of your human languages anyway and it would be best to limit eye contact as the evening wears on- to avoid accidental 'Be-spelling' with glamour. Some of our guests this evening are, how do you say it? 'Sloppy drunks.' And they may forget their promise to our Queen to resist throwing glamour out at the help...for extra favors." She paused and eyed the men knowingly, "And for tonight... your duties do not include dalliances."

All three men quirked their eyebrows and swallowed hard at the same time.

Then the room they were in began to shimmer and suddenly it felt like they were all on an elevator ride, one that went up as well as sideways. They moved fast through castle's torch lined hallways; taking turns and switch backs that left the men disoriented and dizzy.

When all of a sudden their motion slowed to a stop and they were pushed through a set of large wooden swinging doors that put them in a huge kitchen.

The smells hit them first. Fragrant spices and tempting aromas rose up from covered pots and roasting main courses cooking on huge wood burning stoves . Uniform clad humans and elves were side by side chopping exotic food and arranging them on platters. The men turned around to take in the whole sight but before they could focus on any one thing each was handed a large silver serving Urn and they found themselves being pushed through the other set of swinging kitchen doors and into the Grand Hall.

The lighting inside the great hall was strange. Everything was caste in different shades of blue and throughout the crowd twinkling little lights in flight darted everywhere like fireflies on a hot July night.

One buzzed too close to Dean's head and he ducked yelping "Fairies!"

The rest of the crowd was composed of humanoid types some almost too beautiful to look at directly ( those were from the Seelie court) and others looked like the stuff of nightmares ( those were from the Unseelie court).

Then- the sound hit them. It assaulted their ears. The relative hum of activity from the kitchen was replaced by loud voices and laughter all shouting to be heard over the music. A Fae duo was preforming on the stage above and to the left of them. Sam, Dean and Bobby had never heard such music before. The haunting, frantic sound was being played on large stringed instruments, it had a driving rhythm and the musicians looked more like they were beating their instruments rather than playing them as the strings on the bows frayed and split with each savage stroke.

Bobby and Sam winced against the sound but Dean listened. "Wait a minute!" he smiled broadly at his brother and nodded to Bobby. "I know this one," he shouted, "It's "Welcome To The Jungle' by Gun's and Roses!" to prove his point he nudged Sam nearly spilling his Urn. Sam frowned and murmured to himself, "Never heard it like this before."

The musicians started another rendition of a popular song that bore only an eerie resemblance to familiar tune. It was jarring, unearthly and eloquent and then morphed into an almost vicious feeling by the way they ravaged and mutated the notes. It is said you can tell a lot about a culture by the style of their art, if that held true in this parallel world, then the Fae were a dangerously strange race.

wWw

"More Wine!" came a shout and their eyes shifted to a large, reclining Fae ( who bore an unflattering resemblance to Jabba the Hut), as he waved an empty goblet at them.

Neither man moved. Bobby looked at the frozen brothers and rolled his eyes, "Follow my lead." He said loudly and stepped over to serve the Fae guest.

But the guest waved him away and gestured with a lear to Dean to be his server.

Dean instinctively pulled the urn his was holding closer to his chest and involuntarily took one step back. Sam's jaw went tight as he glared at the guest, then saved the day by "accidentally" bumping into Dean's arm and slopping the libation on the couch the guest was reclining upon. The Fae jumped up sputtering curses and instantly a flurry of sparkling lights surrounded the guest cleaning and preening and calming his ruffled ego. With the distraction of the fairy's intervention the three men quickly put some distance between the indignant guest by making their way deeper into the crowd.

Dean's eyes were still a little wide as they moved through the crowd and he said to Sam, "Well, that Cantina Band wanabe was almost a too close an encounter."

His younger brother grinned and replied, "Hey, you're the one always saying that you're the handsome one."

"Shut up!" Dean countered.

Bobby sighed and told them both, " You idjits just stick close, it could be a long night."

To Be Continued

Reviews welcome


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